“Don’t Let Me Down” by The Chainsmokers
Crashing, hit a wall
Right now I need a miracle
Hurry up now, I need a miracle
Stranded, reaching out
I call your name but you’re not around
I say your name but you’re not aroundI need you, I need you, I need you right now
Yeah, I need you right now
So don’t let me, don’t let me, don’t let me down
I think I’m losing my mind now
It’s in my head, darling, I hope
That you’ll be here, when I need you the most
So don’t let me, don’t let me, don’t let me down
D-don’t let me downDon’t let me down
Don’t let me down, down, down
Don’t let me down, don’t let me down, down, downRunning out of time
I really thought you were on my side
But now there’s nobody by my sideI need you, I need you, I need you right now
Yeah, I need you right now
So don’t let me, don’t let me, don’t let me down
I think I’m losing my mind now
It’s in my head, darling, I hope
That you’ll be here, when I need you the most
So don’t let me, don’t let me, don’t let me down
D-don’t let me downDon’t let me down
Don’t let me down, down, down
Don’t let me down, down, down
Don’t let me down, down, down
Don’t let me down, don’t let me down, down, downOh, I think I’m losing my mind now, yeah
Oh, I think I’m losing my mind now, yeahI need you, I need you, I need you right now
Yeah, I need you right now
So don’t let me, don’t let me, don’t let me down
I think I’m losing my mind now
It’s in my head, darling, I hope
That you’ll be here, when I need you the most
So don’t let me, don’t let me, don’t let me down
Don’t let me downYeah, don’t let me down
Yeah, don’t let me down
Don’t let me down, oh, no
Said don’t let me down
Don’t let me downDon’t let me down
Don’t let me down, down, down
2 weeks ago, I knew OneRepublic, Ariana Grande and The Chainsmokers were coming to Singapore for Formula One Grand Prix. So, I downloaded some of their songs to listen and learn them a few days in advance. But I didn’t have enough time to prepare because my physical schedule was quite tight; I had been kept busy doing my own personal physical stuff – doing art, blogging, planning etc. I also had my own family matters to tend to as well. That Friday night, I had to travel to Malaysia because my father wanted me to help set up his security cameras – something I really hated to do since a few years ago because it always took up a lot of my time and it was frustrating that it always wouldn’t work very well. By the time I was done, it was already about 2am and I was already too tired and sleepy to sing and even shower, so I just went to sleep. About 11 plus the next morning, I woke up and read my instagram just to check for updates about Taenggu. That was where I finally saw the confirmed setlist that Taenggu was going to perform at Albatross Music Festival at Vancouver which was due to start in a couple of hours’ time. I originally prepared Fine, Rain, 11:11, Make Me Love You and I for her already but in the confirmed setlist, the songs were I, Fine, 11:11, Why, Hands On Me and I’m OK. I had 3 hits, 3 misses, 2 wasted – I still had to sing Why, Hands On Me and I’m OK. I was actually very angry already about having to do all these extra work simply because no one told me the confirmed setlist and I always had to guess what songs she was going to sing. I knew I also had to prepare the songs for Ariana Grande and The Chainsmokers who were going to perform in Singapore that night. But I knew I had to sing for Taenggu first because hers was more urgent.
**Interesting thing I noticed was that my tweet of my setlist for this particular concert had unusually lots of reactions (likes and retweets) from the fans of the artistes. Usually there were none at all. So I actually was quite happy to see some reactions finally.**
170915 CONCERTS
ALBATROSS MUSIC FESTIVAL 2017 @ VANCOUVER
Taeyeon –
Fine
Rain
11:11
MMLY
IFar East Movement –
Like A G6
Rocketeer— Celeste Koh (@mindofsoul27) September 14, 2017
After taking breakfast, I went to the toilet, sat at the toilet bowl to sing. I sang the 3 songs for Taenggu first but I knew I was feeling kind of impatient and distracted already. Then, I moved on to Ariana Grande when my parents came back home. I was trying to sing when my mum kept knocking at my door, asking me to hurry because they wanted to pack up to return to Singapore already. I knew I also had to rush back to Singapore to meet my friends to celebrate one of their birthdays in the evening. I was very annoyed already and I knew I also had to take my shower too because I didn’t shower last night. Suddenly, I felt so torn apart and became very angry with the whole world. It was so unfair – why did I have to do all these without being acknowledged by anyone, even my own parents, yet still getting thrown around here and there? In the end, I only sang 2 songs for Ariana Grande and gave up completely on The Chainsmokers, just so I could take my shower. In the shower, I felt so indignified that I scolded f*** and b*tch after a long time (probably less than 5 times in my life, but never to anyone around me, even though sometimes voices in my head would try to induce me to curse). But I didn’t like how I sounded like – I don’t sound like myself – when I cursed. My inner world was kind of shocked that I did and I heard a girl voice saying, “Let me take care of her.” Instantly, I felt a wave of holy sensation over me, as if someone was washing me up with the soap on my body with my own hands. Even though I was still in a bad mood, the shower felt unusually comfortable and relaxed.
After I got myself changed into my clothes, I sat on the sofa just a few minutes before Taenggu was about to perform at Vancouver (I saw the information from instagram about the specific time of her turn to perform at the concert). Suddenly, I saw a series of visions of Taenggu rushing over to find me, stroking my head and showing her concerns to me. I also saw her talking over the phone, asking me, “Are you okay? Is it because of your mum?” For a moment, I thought to myself, “Wah, maybe it wasn’t too bad to curse after all. I could see so much more of Taenggu being so concerned about me after I did.” Keke. Honestly, after that, I tried to scold Taenggu the same thing again, but it didn’t feel good anymore – I felt even worse. My heart became heavier. It sort of aroused even more anger and unhappiness I had kept within myself all these years. I was reminded of all the unhappy memories in my head. So I stopped doing that to Taenggu after that day.
The following week, one night I slept late after doing mind singing and ate a pill. The next morning, I overslept because I had a really vivid dream of myself going to an illegal gambling den with my mum by mistake. I went to the office late and my boss misunderstood me and sort of had a word with me to tell me to go to work earlier next time. I became angry with my situation. I began to think the whole world was so wrong, so unfair. Especially mind singing, I was on the verge of giving it up already because I felt like my efforts all these years were still not recognised by anybody around me and it seemed so pointless to me now. When I was feeling so down and disappointed, I went to the shower. Instead of singing, I put this song “Don’t Let Me Down” by The Chainsmokers on repeat and listened to it over and over again. The part of the lyrics “Don’t let me down, Don’t let me down, down, down…” kept playing over and over again in my head. I felt like everyone in this world was letting me down. But I felt better listening to it because it felt like the song was helping me to voice out all the resentments within me.
This morning, 27 September, I was in deep sleep, maybe because I ate my pill the night before. The alarm woke me up at around 8.30am but my eyes were still so heavy and I just felt like continuing to sleep. I had been feeling rather depressed lately. Subconsciously as I kept my eyes closed, I thought I could see Taenggu or hear some voices sounding a little angry at me. Always trying to tell me something, but I never really understood what they meant. Then at one point, I heard a familiar tune in my mind – it sounded like the intro of Don’t Let Me Down. I thought it came from my own memory of the song.
At around 9am, I finally tried to shake myself awake, trying to liven up my mood. I picked up my phone, opened my instagram app and saw an update from Taenggu’s instagram. It was another series of travelogue videos made by Taenggu! With my eyes half-opened, I watched the videos and the music she used instantly grabbed my attention. It was exactly the same tune I heard in my mind awhile ago!
But at first, the start of the song (the first video) sounded so strangely new but familiar to my ears, as if I knew I heard it somewhere before but I suddenly couldn’t remember. When I realised it was Don’t Let Me Down which I had been listening to last week, I knew my mind had shifted; my focus was different now. Last week, my attention was on “Don’t let me down, Don’t let me down, down, down”, now it was “Stranded, reaching out, I call your name but you’re not around, I say your name but you’re not around, I need you, I need you, I need you right now, Yeah, I need you right now” and the rest sounded softer in comparison. I was sort of surprised that I didn’t notice this part of the lyrics actually existed when I listened to it last week.
And I felt so much happier watching this one as compared to her previous one posted on 11 September. Because she looked so happy here to me, as if I really felt something close to her, as if a part of me was really there with her at Switzerland at that time. So I felt more excited with this episode. Hahaha.
And I finally understood why I had visions of Taenggu and even heard the same tune of Don’t Let Me Down in my head. I guess it was Taenggu who was trying to wake me up to watch her Taenggu TV after all. I think the important factor why my mood was instantly lifted was because she used the same song I was listening to last week. It proved to me that she was aware of it the whole time when I was in the bad mood and knew I had been listening to this song a lot to relieve myself. So I appreciated it so much because it made me feel that the physical part of me was still involved and had a part to play in her life after all. Naturally, she began to look visually much happier to me in the videos, and I also felt happier because of that.
Meanwhile, I still feel kind of depressed as I begin to feel lost in the direction of my life right now… Still trying to find meaning and purpose of mind singing. Please don’t let me down, Heaven. <3
3 thoughts on “Lyrics: Don’t Let Me Down + Why I Feel Like Giving Up On Mind Singing”