Love Diary: Come Up To Meet You And Ask You My Questions

26 April 2017

I had a facial appointment on Monday. As usual, I asked Taenggu to come with me. At 6pm, I went to SkinLab clinic at Westgate, just near my workplace. During the 1.5-hour session, when I was just lying down not able to move and feeling kind of bored, my mind was wandering around and thinking about all sorts of things. There was one point of time when I started mind-talking with Taenggu. I started by asking her repeatedly to come to Singapore for her Asia tour. “When are you coming to Singapore?” “Please come to Singapore!” After awhile, I stopped to think she probably couldn’t totally control if she could really come to Singapore anyway. There are probably many other factors involved to consider. But I decided not to give up and continued whining to her to come to Singapore.

Finally, a voice replied, “Yes, I’m coming! What will you ask me this time?” I hesitated for awhile and decided that she was probably referring to how I would be talking to her through my mind from the audience seat during her concert. So, I started imagining myself sitting in the audience and asking her a series of questions.

Me: “Have you tried chicken rice? Laksa? Nasi Lemak? Roti Prata? Or do you still always eat the Chilli Crab that I’ve never eaten before myself? But I like the buns and the sauce though.”

Voice: “Char Kway Teow?”

Me: “Oh I like Char Kway Teow too! I don’t eat it often because it is fattening. But the clams are really nice! I can bring you to eat Char Kway Teow!”

Voice: “I wanna get fat.”

Me: “I can take you around Singapore to eat nice food! Come find me and we go eat together! Come with me!”

Me: “Can you come to my house? It’s in Woodlands. But it is very far away from the Singapore Indoor Stadium. You need to take the train for almost an hour to reach my house. Or you can also take Uber. Faster.”

Me: “Please come to Singapore! Come find me!”

My mind could go on and on. I was happy because I heard some replies in my head. It was a happy conversation.

On Tuesday night, I was lying on the bed and talking to Bobo/Taenggu. Halfway through our conversation, a voice said “I wanna get you to meet some Koreans.” I thought for awhile and said “Okay! Please meet me!” The voice sounded surprised that I actually agreed and said something like “I thought you would be shy…” I said “It’s okay. I wanna meet! When and where??” Voice said “Tomorrow.” Although I knew it sounded suspicious, I decided to play along and said “But before that, I need to meet you first. Lovers should meet. I wanna meet you! But I don’t mind meeting anybody related to you too.” After that, I kept telling Taenggu that I wanna meet her and ask her to please come to meet me.

Later on, I gave some serious thoughts about what the voice said. After all that had happened in 2015, I have learnt not to take certain voices that I hear too seriously. At the end of the day, if I don’t actually see them coming true to me, they all become empty promises and that breaks my heart even more. Now that I’ve grown wiser than before and think harder about it, when the voices say they wanna meet me, they may not necessarily mean meeting the physical me, but probably referring to the spiritual me or my soul instead. But I wanna tell Taenggu that, whether physically or spiritually, I really don’t mind meeting her and anyone around her at all.

The next day, which is today, I messaged Taenggu to tell her about the voice I heard last night and asked her if she really wanted me to meet some Koreans (probably her friends). Later in the afternoon, as if the universe was adjusting to my emotional needs, I found myself walking in front of two guys who were speaking to each other in Korean. Awhile later, when I was at a cafe enjoying a nice cup of hot mocha, I also saw 2 Korean ladies who were sitting at a table in front of me chatting with each other in Korean. Thinking on the bright side, it really helped to balance me out emotionally. In reality (or in my consciousness), I may not be able to remember whether it really happened to me spiritually but at least physically, I really did meet some Koreans today! At least the promise the voice made to me was not so empty this time.

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